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Monday, August 6, 2007

A month ago my father called all of us to remind us that he was turning sixty years old and that for his birthday he wanted $60.00 in cash. He wanted to redo his basement shower.

My father's basement shower is the kind that no woman would ever use. Seriously NEVER. His "den" is of course in the basement. His spot. My step-mother has the kitchen. Why are men's spaces so dark and uninviting to women?

My sister and I take off of work in order to make it to my father's B-day party and present him with his gift. We endure Interstate traffic jams, take an exit and run into small town traffic jams, miss our freeway exit, back track and finally make it to his house 90 minutes late and the food isn't ready. Yes, we took off of work.......

He opens his card, picks out the $240 and says, "Yes, now I can buy a new LCD TV for my Man Den." (the basement) I felt betrayed.

Back to my TV worries.

So here we are 24 hours with a broken tv.

My journey….

To begin, I consulted family and friends for advice about my TV.

To review. I turned the TV on. Walked out of the room to take in the lovely weather on the porch. Returned and the TV was off. Been that way ever since.

The questions….

The TV will not power on?

I have already made that clear.

Is it plugged in?

Wasn’t sure if I should have been completely offended by this question. What do you think?

Did you plug it into a different outlet?

Wouldn’t you try that first? Is that not common sense. I do, after all, have a college degree….

Well, there was a thunderstorm did you check that the power strip needs to be reset? Again… Does it seem reasonable to ask me that? Okay, maybe. There was a thunderstorm that morning but the TV did come on that afternoon. But my father expected me to check it while he was on the phone.

Well, did you check the power strip?

Seriously. That is not the problem.

How do you know that it will not come on?

I ignored this question from my co-worker.

Are you trying to turn it on with the remote? Or the power button?

I bit my tongue when he asked me this. Like I was some kind of Tech nimrod. As if I would not walk my fat butt over to the TV and press the Power button - or check the batteries in the remote. It made me angry because I stated that the TV mysteriously shut itself off. I would have been more open to the possibility that I have a poltergeist than the idea that I am such a total loser who tries to turn on a TV with a broken remote. That would be Armond Reynolds.

Did you unplug it for 15 minutes and check it again?

Not a bad suggestion but every piece of equipment has that weird flaw. Unplug it and it will turn on… Why is that anyway? I just don’t get it. Like some kind of karma belief or buddha quote.

Unplug it and it will turn on...
Take away the negative energy and the positive energy will find its way into your life.

Was it on during the lightning storm? Are you sure that it did not get zapped?Yes, clearly I am sure that it did not get zapped since it is attached to a very expensive power strip that powers five working pieces of electronic devices.

Exactly what happened?

Argh.

Well Cousin L suggested that I may have purchased the extended warranty. I assumed that it had run out after three years. He thought that perhaps that I may have bought a 5 year warranty. Right..... I am sure the 5 year warranty was more expensive than the TV when I bought it. However, on that hunch I called the store. Fortunately, I purchased the 3-year warranty that expires 8-31-07. Small favors.

On the other hand.

WHAT KIND OF EQUIPMENT BREAKS THREE WEEKS BEFORE THE WARRANTY RUNS OUT?

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