Jizz inside her again and again

Ownership The joys of homeownership.
This week's GBE2 prompt is ownership.

I thought this would be the blog entry to update you on the Possum Occupation of 2011. This is the hole dug along my foundation.Uncle Handyman felt that since he was digging along my foundation then he should check for leaks.

This is the worker looking for the possum entrance.

So much for the garden. Contractors don't respect anything. I got a call saying that they were there, I rush home and my clematis is already destroyed. Uncle Handyman determined that the possum must have dug a hold under the house addition.

This should have happened as the building codes stipulate construction should go to at least 5 feet below the ground. The previous owner only oversaw the depth of 3 cinderblocks. This makes sense to men. Have at it.

What remains of my collard greens. I think there is enough for one half of a holiday meal. That is a lot of dirt. When they attempted to fill the holes the backyard did not appear to be level. As if, more dirt joined the party. I am still trying to level the back yard before the frost.

They found it. Uncle Handyman compelled me to jump into the cavity in my backyard and see the possum hole for myself. I didn't want to do it. But here is the proof that I did.

A better view for you. I had to reach up to get this photo.

This entry makes me nostalgic. I began blogging shortly after I purchased my house. So many things went wrong in the first six months.
I would link you to those old entries but they went away with Yahoo! 360. That experience taught me to have two sites, one acting like a backup

I found some pictures that were used in the original blog:

Fall of 2004. I hired a company to remodel the upstairs bathroom. When they were complete, I complained that the water pressure was too low.I described it as showering in a rainstorm. Their attempts to review the problem and my plumbing resulted in a discovering that the water main had completely rusted.

Their manipulations caused it to rupture and the City issued a notice to me. My co-workers still refer to my homestead as the Lake House. One even took the time to create an neat image of my house with a lake in front of it. I started a blog not long after this incident.

This is how the front lawn looked in Spring 2005.It recovered from the excavation from the Fall. I ended up firing the original contract company and filing a complaint against them. Long story... that I can't link you to because the journal entry is gone.

I learned as time went by that like contractors, Handymen can be very undependable. Each would get so far in the repairs and then disappear. I hired my first handyman in 2006 and he addressed my curb appeal.

nThe new handyman, Scott, reseeded my lawn. He disappeared before he could build a rain barrel for me. I believe that was around Spring of 2007. I made one for myself using a chisel, pantyhose, grated pipe cover, roofing tar and a threaded hose. Uncle Handyman said that he never saw anything like that before.

This was the only time I have had a real lawn. I remember that Spring in 2005. Just look at it. Scott fixed the poor jobs that the contractors had left behind in my basement. I liked Scott. By the end of the Fall, I felt that I could handle all future home repair issues by myself.

When my bedroom closet, that I had PROUDLY hung, fell, I had to call back Scott to fix it. I sat on the floor crying after it fell. I almost fired him when he told me that I had too many shoes. HOW DARE HE.
In 2006, I redecorated the porch by myself. See the pictures here. Scott was out of the picture by then having left me hanging without a water barrel. I found a new handyman in 2008, Mark. He fixed some of the errors committed by Scott. He left without a word and with half the dining room molding stripped of stain.I think that was in 2009. The next guy that I used did his own disappearing act after not properly sealing the flat roof. After that incident, I decided to only work with family and Uncle Handyman.
After a few years of this I learned to live with the little inconveniences and the gray hairs.
This Spring, the light fixture in the kitchen crashes to the floor leaving two holes in the ceiling, it doesn't bother me. I ask Cousin L to install this light fixture.

I think it is a great fix. Uncle Handyman laughed.


Look at what this guy did




see more There I Fixed It

Let me provide you with a listing of my favorite home ownership adventures that survived the move to Multiply and Blogger.

1. Strays: I wrote about roommates that reminded me of stray animals. I have since learned to be more particular.
So, my recent roommate entries have been about great people.
2. Yard work:
*I have written extensively about my lack of lawn care management skills and; grass.
*My attempts at mulching, growing and gardening are documented
3. Outdoor pests: My feral cat problems, which continue to plague me, again
4. My life with my neighbors and that one annoying family across the street
5. That time my TV brokeDay 2 and Day 4
6. Changing handyman because they like to disappear. This is the only surviving handyman entry-the Case of the leaking bathroom vent
7.The mysterious pooing of 2008
8. The flying trashcan
9. The insane house cats: Fuzzy, Fattie, Halle
10. The gnome that protects my home and garden
11. The bat infiltration of 2010 
Blogging has been loads of fun and given me an outlet for my home ownership adventures. Thanks for reading.

Spend this night boning her

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends

OneStopBlogWorld

Since my roommate moved out, I have had only Fuzzy to keep me company at night. So I guess that I have been paying more attention to her behavior.
For instance, I caught her doing an impression of ceiling cat in the basement.

see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!

She exited from a small opening that led to the area above the basement drop ceiling and under the main floor. I wondered what she could be up to in there and then quickly put it out of my head.
Until, I spotted a stain on ceiling tiles.
I removed the tile and found some very strange stuff. Leaves. Like from the Fall.
Eh.
I made a call to Uncle Handyman and told him that I wanted him to come over.Remember the groundhog burrow under my garden? I figured that somehow the leaves had blown in at the start of the season. Sometime after April when AT and T pulled down ALL the ceiling tiles to replace my telephone wires. Besides, the garden was done for the season seeing how all the veggies were eaten the week before.
I couldn't schedule him to come to the house right away because I work late Tuesday thru Thursday and that weekend I had events to attend. The groundhog burrow and leaves in my basement could wait a little while longer.
Fuzzy started acting strange again. I noticed around Sunday night that she had stopped eating.
Tuesday morning as I am leaving for the gym I smelled something awful in the living room. I see Fuzzy pawing at floor near the couch and remember that I forgot to clean her liter box.
Feeling remorse, I drop my bags and look under the couch to see where she poo'd.
I spotted one of my elephant toys under the couch and cried, "Not Ellie." Fuzzy surely had poo'd all over Ellie in retribution for my not cleaning her litter box.
I pushed the toy back behind the couch with a broom and climbed the couch to reach out with my gloved hand to grab the filthy toy.

It Blinked.

I screamed.

Fuzzy ran.

Well, Fuzzy sure was helpful.
I called a friend and described the animal through gasping breaths.
It was a possum.
I called Leeza, next door, and told her about it. She came over with a net. Yes, the same net she brought over last year when I had the bat in my bathroom.

The neighbors were a godsend.
Leeza insisted on taking a picture of it.

After some silly running around to rearrange furniture, we realized that we were out of our league. I walked out onto my porch, observed the houses with lights at 7 am and picked the neighbor who I liked more.

She sent her husband over and the three of us created a pathway out of the house for the possum that was in no mood to leave. Finally, Leeza got her German Shephard to coax the creature out of the house.

And he sure did. Coaxed the poo right out of the possum all over my living room.

We finally got the dog away from the possum and the possum into the net.

Here it is playing possum. In the second picture it is pooping again.

During all of this my horrible sister made numerous "helpful" calls,
1. "No one from the city will remove a possum. They are vicious."
2. "Be sure to use gloves, possums carry diseases"
3. "You should check your basement. Possum's have ten babies"
4. "Kitty litter on the possum poop is a good idea. That stuff is a hell to clean up"
5. "My co-worker said that you should buy two animal traps: one for the outside and one for the inside"
6. "If you don't catch them all, they will just keep coming back"

After thanking my neighbors, walking past the poo filled living room to sit in my upstairs bedroom, I decided to draft some poetry while I calmed myself:

The groundhog eats from

the garden treats and invites

possum for nightcaps

Small possum all alone

Wonder where large possums go

After sunrises 

Goldilocks critter

cat food not too hot or cold

kitty traps the thief 

Stuffed toy under chair

Does not blink but possums do

Kitty runs and hides 

Barkless dog sniffs prey

Jaws clamps down and poops exhudes

From possums stink hole 

I posted the verses on Facebook and my online friends helped me to get back to my life and head to work. So, it would seem that I had a lot of help from my friends in getting my house back to normal. Too bad I had ignored all of Fuzzy's signs that something was wrong in my house.

Yardwork and Tar

I have not posted due to the start of everything.
The sorority year.
The academic year.
And Fall allergies.
You are welcome.
I did have some work done on the house recently.  I hired my uncle to dig up the front yard and waterproof it.  He gave me two days to prepare the yard.  I wanted to link you to some of my old posts about the yard work I had done in 2005. Unfortunately, those posts went away when Yahoo 360 turned off. 

I had to do some foliage removal.
I dug out the Grandpa's peonies. I hope that I found all of the root ball.  I removed the Easter lilies and the Asian lilies.  I left the sedum. It just grows like crazy anyway.   

I used the pitchfork and removed all of the other  lilies. The sage. Everything.  I only left the clematis. 

I repotted everything while the men did their work.








It took them a few days.  They leveled out the yard when they completed their tasks. Unfortunately, the noodleheads emptied the dirt out of my POTS in order to level the yard.  I yelled at them. I asked them why did they not use the dirt behind the garage. My Uncle's worker informed me that he did not want to leave holes in my yard.
I thought that was the stupidest thing I had ever heard.  The men had watched me dig out my plants and pot them.  Watched me.  So why would it be a good idea to empty them out????? The patch of land behind my garage is about 3 feet wide and is nothing but a dumping ground for non-compost material. Besides the compost bin is back there and full of dirt.

  Oh look, this is my fifth year at my house and still no grass.
Stupid grass.

I have been finding perennials on sale. Look at this hibiscus that I found for $5.00. I am not going to replant the peonies here. I am going to move them to another location. I am looking for yellow coneflower that isn't 13 dollars and red coneflowers.  I would love a coneflower garden. 

You can see from the two previous pictures  that my uncle is a man of his word.  I wanted some waterproofing done so that my basement would be drier and he used the remaining tar to "paint" my exposed brick foundation.  I am still shaking my head. If he works on my house again, I will take the day off of work.   I repainted the brick to match the trimming.  Still shaking my head. 

I am thinking about submitting a picture of his work to There I Fixed It

I guess while I wait for the spring and summer bulbs that I ordered to arrive, I will use the time to make some mint liquor. 

 

And some pesto

I think the gnome attacked the elephant sculpture. You can see it in the background.  The gnome is standing where the elephant had been.\

Travelocity Gnome - 8-inch

Front Wheel Drive

Yesterday, I had a 6 p.m. meeting about 35 minutes away from my house and 45 minutes away from my job. I left work a few minutes early in order to run home and pick up some after work clothes to wear at the meeting. No sense in wearing heels for another two hours.
I got stuck in the parking space outside my office. The wheels just kept turning and turning while I remained at my job. It took some fanciness before I finally pulled out of the lot.
My street is an insignificant little drive. The city crews will probably shovel all the snow into the base of my driveway today, trapping all parked cars in their un-roofed igloos. It didn't matter though as yesterday's snow fall had made turning onto my drive treacherous and pulling into my driveway impossible. After much aggravation and wheel spinning, I parked my car the best way that I could, albeit crooked and not flush with either side of the street, and shoveled my driveway. About forty-five minutes later, I walk into my house and brush the snow off my pants and decided "to hell with my meeting."

I pulled the trashcans across the 40ft driveway. I had only shoveled half of it. And placed them out front. This morning, I heard the sanitation department and this is what I saw out of my window after they had left.
<= My neighbor's house

<<another neighbor's front yard.

^This is the front of my house. Do you see the picture that does not belong?
Go back and review the first two pictures.
Do you see it now?


Okay here is a close-up picture of my front lawn. Not the devil's strip owned by the city but MY FRONT LAWN.
Do you see that damn trash can lying on the walkway toward my FRONT DOOR?
There are so many scenarios of what could have happened that I don't want to think about it.

Madness.