Promises

So here we are, Day 4 without a TV

I have been trying to write a new blog post for two days. I have had some adventure.

On Wednesday I had four events to orchestrate. First, I promised to meet with my aunt and uncle to give to them my dining room table. I realized they did not have one when I went to visit a few weeks back. Later, I promised to meet a friend moving out of town to buy and pick up her table. That was the heavy stuff. A friend was celebrating the one-year anniversary of her 30^th B-day at the local margarita restaurant and I promised her that I would drink at least one margarita with her. And finally, I had promised my neighbor that I would drive her to the movies.

The last item is the most interesting. Apparently, when I was visiting with my neighbors last Saturday drinking margaritas made with 1800 and taking kamikaze shots I made this promise to be the driver. The movie we were seeing was Superbad… I promise you that had I been sober, there is no way I would have made that promise. I had no plans to see Superbad. Potty humor is not my favorite genre. It was funny but it would have been funnier at home on cable.

I was able to complete two of the four tasks. Picked up the new table on Thursday and by the time the movie was over the B-day anniversary party was also over. I didn’t really need more margaritas, I guess.

After I got the new table on Thursday, I went to dancing lessons. I convinced my blind date to meet me there. I guess it wasn’t really a blind date since I had chatted with him a few times on the IM. Anyway, we met at the place and found ourselves in the slow section of the class. Ha. Funny stuff.

Back to the TV

I called the store about the warranty and was informed that since my TV was 26” I could bring it into the service center. I remarked, “Seriously? You want me to bring it in?” I asked about the charge for in-home service. He told me, one hundred and five dollars and suggested that renew the warranty with an in-home option because it would probably be cheaper than in-home service under the current warranty.

They always lie…… Always try to reel me in by promising me the world. And I fall for it every time.

The more than $400 price tag for the upgraded multi-year warranty was outrageous. I am convinced that it was more than the original cost of the TV without the original warranty. I remarked to the agent that the competitor had TV’s for sale in Sunday’s circular for about the same price. She reminded me that this was a multi-year in home warranty good for parts and labor.

I informed her again that for the same price I could have a new TV with a new warranty. She gave me the price of a 2 year warranty for almost $300, I told her it just didn’t’ seem reasonable to spend that much money on a warranty. I decided to tell my nephew that I needed help getting the TV to the store in order to get it fixed and promised to pay him for his trouble. He needs some extra cash and has called me everyday wanting to “help me” get the TV into my car.

He always says, “When do you want me to help you take the TV to the store?” I keep saying, “When it isn’t pouring rain outside.” Even so, he has yet to call when it is not raining. Maybe when it is raining he is reminded of how bored and broke he is and that is why he calls.

More TVs

A month ago my father called all of us to remind us that he was turning sixty years old and that for his birthday he wanted $60.00 in cash. He wanted to redo his basement shower.

My father's basement shower is the kind that no woman would ever use. Seriously NEVER. His "den" is of course in the basement. His spot. My step-mother has the kitchen. Why are men's spaces so dark and uninviting to women?

My sister and I take off of work in order to make it to my father's B-day party and present him with his gift. We endure Interstate traffic jams, take an exit and run into small town traffic jams, miss our freeway exit, back track and finally make it to his house 90 minutes late and the food isn't ready. Yes, we took off of work.......

He opens his card, picks out the $240 and says, "Yes, now I can buy a new LCD TV for my Man Den." (the basement) I felt betrayed.

Back to my TV worries.

So here we are 24 hours with a broken tv.

My journey….

To begin, I consulted family and friends for advice about my TV.

To review. I turned the TV on. Walked out of the room to take in the lovely weather on the porch. Returned and the TV was off. Been that way ever since.

The questions….

The TV will not power on?

I have already made that clear.

Is it plugged in?

Wasn’t sure if I should have been completely offended by this question. What do you think?

Did you plug it into a different outlet?

Wouldn’t you try that first? Is that not common sense. I do, after all, have a college degree….

Well, there was a thunderstorm did you check that the power strip needs to be reset? Again… Does it seem reasonable to ask me that? Okay, maybe. There was a thunderstorm that morning but the TV did come on that afternoon. But my father expected me to check it while he was on the phone.

Well, did you check the power strip?

Seriously. That is not the problem.

How do you know that it will not come on?

I ignored this question from my co-worker.

Are you trying to turn it on with the remote? Or the power button?

I bit my tongue when he asked me this. Like I was some kind of Tech nimrod. As if I would not walk my fat butt over to the TV and press the Power button - or check the batteries in the remote. It made me angry because I stated that the TV mysteriously shut itself off. I would have been more open to the possibility that I have a poltergeist than the idea that I am such a total loser who tries to turn on a TV with a broken remote. That would be Armond Reynolds.

Did you unplug it for 15 minutes and check it again?

Not a bad suggestion but every piece of equipment has that weird flaw. Unplug it and it will turn on… Why is that anyway? I just don’t get it. Like some kind of karma belief or buddha quote.

Unplug it and it will turn on...

Take away the negative energy and the positive energy will find its way into your life.

Was it on during the lightning storm? Are you sure that it did not get zapped?Yes, clearly I am sure that it did not get zapped since it is attached to a very expensive power strip that powers five working pieces of electronic devices.

Exactly what happened?

Argh.

Well Cousin L suggested that I may have purchased the extended warranty. I assumed that it had run out after three years. He thought that perhaps that I may have bought a 5 year warranty. Right..... I am sure the 5 year warranty was more expensive than the TV when I bought it. However, on that hunch I called the store. Fortunately, I purchased the 3-year warranty that expires 8-31-07. Small favors.

On the other hand.

WHAT KIND OF EQUIPMENT BREAKS THREE WEEKS BEFORE THE WARRANTY RUNS OUT?

Send Pizza

Well, I took two weeks off of work in the middle of a heat wave. So many things I wanted to share with you. All the things that I did. All of the very funny observations that I made

Like---- Why do men like to use the basement commode rather than the regular bathroom. My father whenever he comes to visit makes a beeline for the basement bathroom. It is pretty ordinary. One toilet. A utility sink. A shower. He seems to prefer it. Always has. What is with that????

I want to tell you about my trip to Milwaukee WI where I drank beer and my traveling friends searched for a strap for a pair of sunglasses.

I will tell you about the To Do list that was not completed.

Then there is the My Cripple Me Crochet project that had to be put on hold. The wood stripping project that ruined my back – put me on the couch for two days…..

I would like to share with you what happens when I am on vacation and start hanging out with my neighbors who have a brother-in-law boarder that has a crush on me.

There is of course the book reading list that I completed during the two weeks.

Or the humiliation that I endured because I still use a regular camera.

The vegetables that burned in the sun. Or the tomatillo plant that has taken over my tomato patch. Never saw a tomatillo plant before. I was talked into buying this by the greenhouse lady.

So many events that I would like to share

IN DUE TIME because right now I am totally irritated.

Out of sorts

Depressed

My soul aches.

Why? Because today, while home eating lunch…..

My dynaflat, widescreen HD ready television mysteriously shut off and has yet to turn back on..

I am so upset I just ate an entire thin crust vegetarian large pizza – unashamed.

I will have to make a decision: get it fixed or buy a new one. I hear that the prices have gone down considerably. I still have working TV’s from college (18 years ago) and graduate school (14 YEARS AGO) yet this one did not last four years. They were original RCAs (before it was sold) and the TVs got crappy. Not sure how they are made now because I will not buy an RCA.

What gives? Isn’t it funny that as technology becomes more complicated we have lower tolerance for failure. For example, if the toilet breaks you call a plumber and you don’t complain about it. But if the computer breaks – a much more sophisticated machine – you complain, write letters, vow to never buy that brand again and if you are like me you write a blog about it.

Maybe I will just forget about a new TV and visit the neighbors more.

What I Got for XMas

Sometimes I hate being a woman

Sometimes it is simply not worth it

This is never more evident than when shopping in the electronics section of a department store.

Never fails. I always feel completely helpless, alone and annoyed.

Years ago I wanted a cd player to take to college. My cousin went with me to the appliance store to buy one. Our salesperson looked like Barbie’s bestfriend Kelly. She knew about as much about cd players as I did. I would have gotten more accomplished if I had asked her for beauty tips. Why was she there anyway? To attract male customers with her charm? We sent her away while we looked around. He helped me find a cd player that still works today. He sent a letter to the company questioning their hiring practices.
A few years back I went to a now-closed appliance store to buy a 19” tv. I walked directly to back. I looked at the tvs. I stood near the tvs. I waited. I played on the video monitor. I sang songs out loud. I watched tv. Finally, I left.

The next day I begged my boyfriend to go with me. We didn’t get within 15 yards of a tv before someone asked HIM if he needed help. He told the salesperson that I needed a tv. The salesperson continued to speak to him. I was fuming. He bought a 27 inch tv that day and I went to Kaufmann’s by myself and got my 19 inch. I wrote a letter of complaint. I got a 20 gift certificate apology. Ironic that the apology sent me back to the store to shop.

When I bought my appliances for my home I took my mother. We were both ignored. I got so frustrated I stalked a salesperson and demanded assistance. Why do they ask you if you need help when you track them down? Isn’t it obvious? What is with those warranty programs?. You pay for 3 years of service but you have to contact them for maintenance. That seems stupid. If I am setting up a contract with your company you should be reminding me that I need to conduct regular maintenance.
Last week, I finally decided to buy a new tv. I decided that I wanted to go to a department store that had a small selection so that I would not be overwhelmed with options. I ended up at Sears.

Big Mistake.

It was the post-holiday shopping and there were a lot of couples there. For those of you who do not understand. Salespeople seem to think that single women shoppers don’t know what they want or have the money to buy it. But if there is a man on her arm of rugrats at her ankles then she is serious. So I am standing by the tvs. I am walking around the tvs. I am looking at the tvs. I am touching the tvs. But the damn salespeople make a beeline to each couple that enters the department. I called clsteelcurtain98. I asked him to come to the store and stand next to me so that I would get some service. He told me to go to circuit city. As we are talking, more couples enter the area. I am panicking. Noone will help me if they don’t stop. Clsteelcurtain98 is telling me that i could have been in the parking lot of Circuit City by now if I had taken his advice. Circuit city scares me. There is so much…….. How could I possible decide on which tv to get with so many options? By myself. I am just a girl, you know. Then he suggests that I knock something over. I consider it. I start walking towards a display and I see this young salesperson. I wave him down and he asks me if I need help. There is that stupid question again.

Well, after all of my experiences in electronics departments I have learned finally how to take the upper hand.
“Can I help you.”
“yes, I need a small tv/dvd player for bedroom. Why is this one more expensive.”
He seemed puzzled by my question. As if the answer was obvious.
“Well, this is a new brand for our store and that is a Sylvania it is an older brand. Now, this one is a Samsung. Samsung is really good brand and it is a flat screen.”
“That may be true but Samsung is $60 more. I just need it to play DVD’s. It doesn’t need to impress my clock radio.”
He seemed a little shaken by that comment. But I was just getting started.
“Okay, well I haven’t had anyone return this brand.”
“What does that mean? And what is the special that you are running with each purchase of a tv?”
“Well,” he said nervously, “um, you get Dish Service activation with a new tv.”
“You don’t really know about the promotion, do you?”
“Well, no, I just got on the floor today and this is a new promotion.”
This was my in. My way of taking up the cause of every single woman that had ever been ignored by a salesperson in the electronics department.
“So, they put you on the floor with no information? Doesn’t seem fair, does it? Is there someone who can explain the promotion to me?”
“Well, yes,” he looks desperately around for another salesperson. I quickly regain his attention.
“You know what, we can talk about that later, will this play recorded cd or dvd’s?”

Next thing I know, the sales person is formally introducing himself to me. I guess he thought if we made friends I would be less aggressive.

Wrong.

“So Rico, why can’t you tell me if this will play recorded cds or dvd’s? How long have you worked here? “
Rico is a college student at UT and is just seasonal.
“So Rico, find out if this will play – as you call it - ‘bootleg’ cd’s”
Rico gets the salesperson that ignored me three times to help couples. I was pissed when I saw him. Then he merely reads to me what’s on the tag under the tv.
“Yeah, I read that already but how does that answer my question. Rico, do you have a cd in your pocket that we could play?” I ignore the second salesperson and started talking to Rico.
After he left, I say to Rico, “your friend wasn’t very helpful. Does that happen a lot? They know you are only temporary and don’t try to help you out? I am going to call my cousin. He will know the answer.”

I call my cousin who used to work in the very same appliance store from with we bought the cd player mentioned above 12 years ago.
My cousin explains that a particular term means that the player will play different formats. I thank my cousin and I tell the little guy the secret phrase.

By now Rico is really tripping. And wants to know all about me. Where do I work. How was my Xmas. He can’t believe that i am giving him such a hard time. --- Rico is trying to make friends.
I ask Rico to find a ruler to measure the tvs because the tag under the tv did not mention its dimensions. Of course, he did not know where to find one.
Finally, I decide to buy the cheaper tv. During checkout i am constantly asking Rico inane questions.

Are you going to tell me about the promotion? Don't you dare ask me about the warranty. Why do you need my phone number? When do you graduate? will you reenlist? do you like working here? do you see those kids over there playing cops and robbers? the father told them to get off the floor, i guess it was optional? So, did you mother really name you Rico or is that a nickname? You aren't a Steelers fan are you?

AT the checkout a couple comes up and actually tries to interrupt Rico as he is making the sale. Perhaps, they didn't think i knew what i wanted or had enough money to buy it. I told him very loudly to “ignore them, they can wait.”

We get all the way through the transaction and I ask Rico, “Oh, is this a stereo dvd player?” I did that on purpose.
He didn’t know. I flip out. “Is there anything in this store that will tell you what you are buying?” “Do I look strong enough to carry a tv around, take it home and then bring it back here cuz it doesn’t play in stereo?”
I was really enjoying myself.
Suddenly he remembers the secret phrase that indicates the tv will play in stereo.
I tell Rico I want the other tv and I finally leave him unforgettable.

Sometimes i love being a woman.