Set Love Mode On

Growing Wild

A few years ago my neighbor Lydia planted a concord grape vine.
She found the vine in the "last chance" section of the gardening department. She never picked the grapes allowing them to remain on the vine and provide food for the birds over the winter.
She really did not expect the vine to live past the first summer. In fact the next Spring, her neighbor cut the vine in preparation for a new family of rentors.
This is the vine now.




In case you are curious, I snapped those pictures from behind my garage and from my driveway.
Below is the diagram of our houses. You see where the vine was planted and how it creeped onto the power lines and is creeping toward my house and Leeza's (VanDam) house.

I finally asked Lydia "What is going on with that grape vine?"

She had no idea that the vine covered the power lines leading to my home. She thought that it had died years ago. I am so tickled by this vine that I have been telling everyone about it. I have called other neighbors into the backyard to see it. I have picked the grapes. They are quite tasty. I have a canopy between the garage and the back neighbors mulberry trees. (Those trees are their own nuisance.)
This week, I called the electric company and took great delight in describing the shrubbery that covers the power lines and everything else behind my garage. They promised to send someone out to remove the vine.Lydia is so embarrassed but to me the 'vine gone wild' is just another summer on my block, this time reminiscent of one of my favorite sci-fi moves.
With that being said let me show you the out of control zucchinis I have growing in the yard.


This is the fourth one that reached this size this summer. I simply cannot keep up with them.

And I have lost the war with the groundhog. These pictures document  what remains of the cabbages despite my attempts to thwart the ground hog

 

Apparently my garden = his grazing station. He ate all of the first cabbage and started on the bottom one. All of the red and green peppers were gone. He nibbled them from the bottom up. Sadly, I will have to pay someone to dig up area around my house since the horrible creature made tunnels under the house and along the driveway. 

Today, a friend shared with me that Juicy Fruit gum gets rid of groundhogs. Next Year. I will be prepared.

Blooming

Finally,
They are here.  I have been watching for my gladiolas for weeks. I planted 75 corns.  I could not locate any of my bulbs from last year.  I am beginning to wonder if I let them stay in the ground. 

 

These are a lovely color. 

I was excited to see more blooms.

Unfortunately, so was someone else.  There are a lot of little girls on my block.  That means that they like to pick flowers for their mothers.  I have found the only way to discourage them from picking flowers from my garden is to invite them over and permit them to select cuttings for themselves. I guess I was taking too long to extend an invitation because, I have less gladiolas each day when I return home from work.

This is the more of my sedum blooming. 
I swear one day I am going to kill off all the grass and replace it with sedum. 

The cucumbers are exploding out of their cage. 

This sage attracts lots of bees. 

This picture just makes me laugh.  He looks like he is watering the weeds. 

Backyard Shenanigans

Edit:  To add pseudo names for my neighbors

This weekend was the holiday.  I spent two evenings with the Van Dames* watching their backyard fireworks.  It could be considered a bit much.  They are nice folks and they had beer.  What can I say?

I am glad that I left the party before the girl fights.  I knew it was a matter of time when the two women would stop drinking and begin fighting.  You can only do some many beer bongs.  After about 4 shots of whiskey, you really need to sit yourself down and be quiet.  Girl A did not bring her own liquor to the party, she took advantage of  Gir -(oops) I mean -Woman B's alcohol and beer bong. I should mention that Woman B's beer bong had been a mother's day present from her fiance.
Yes. It was that type of party.

Really, our friends, relatives and acquaintances come in all forms.  If there is a good time to be had by all , All will have a good time. I was happy to be there.

Woman A took it upon herself to assist Woman B in being hospitable. She cajoled me and Dude into taking whiskey shots and using the beer bong.  Some might call it peer pressure.......
I did it.  Two shots of whiskey one beer bong and then I was ready to get out of there.  The fireworks had been lit and there was nothing to do but watch the slight panic as the bonfire flames edged toward the firewood pile.  Heh. The bonfire was spectacular after the smoke and eye spots  from the sonic booms dissipated.  Yet, I could sense a girlfight.
So, I left.

The next day, the neighborhood fireworks display negated the need to attend the city's fireworks.  I haven't attended the downtown fireworks since I moved here.  I didn't experience it as a child or a young adult in my suburban neighborhoods.  I like this.
Kinda scary but mostly fun.  As a homeowner it behooved me to stand outside and observe the fireworks. I needed to know who to blame if anything were to happen. 

I asked my neighbor, Carlos* about his military status.  I noticed that he diligently places the American flag outside his home each federal holiday.  He shared with me that his son-in-law served in the Army. He died in Iraq.  Now, I will look at his flag and be reminded of the sacrifices that are made by our serviceman. 

Besides for being extra hot, I enjoyed the holiday weekend.  BTW, when it is 90 degrees, even a bike ride is hot. 

I forgot to mention the shenanigans of the Eastsideneighbors. I will not bother giving them a psuedonym.  If you know anything about the Eastside of any rustbelt city, you know enough.

My housemate Roseanne* took this pic of the eastside neighbors having a tailgate party in their driveway.  http://twitpic.com/20lbat
They have a backyard. I have seen it.  It is huge.  There is simply no reason to explain the things that they do. 

Time for a garden update.

They are here. The rudbeckia bloomed.

I have tons of it.  If you would like some, come on over.



I feed the birds. Sometimes, I get a sunflower for my troubles.









This little guy appeared among my collard plants on Sunday.  It is a mystery to how he got there.  I do not know what he is doing in the garden.  I hope he is stomping on slugs.  He gave me a fright when I first spied him in the foliage. 

Most of the coneflowers have bloomed.

 I have an ambulatory gnome!  Today, I found him guarding the tomato plants.    I think I will check for him everyday.  He is kinda cute.

Some People Stop Trying

I finally pulled into my garage around 7:30 pm after a long day of work. I see the cable company's truck in front of my neighbor's house.
A few hours later, I head to the garden for fresh vegetables for my ratatouille. This is what I find in my driveway.

I was like "WTF?" Do you see how the cable is just lying in front of my garage? The cables were cut up and spliced in half. Completely unusable.
Isn't that insane. I don't have cable. I subscribe to satellite dish.
Was it a warning?
Has the recession hit us that hard?????
I called the cable company and refused to provide any personal information. Just my address and a demand that someone pick up that cable mess before I head to the gym at 6:30 am.
I just knew if I gave my name and number, someone telemarketer would add me to their "Give cable a try" campaign.

It was gone.

The cable installer must have been a lazy bugger. I know that 7:30 appointments are probably the last of the day but that was no reason for leaving his mess in my backyard the night before trash pick-up.
There was no way that I was doing his/her job and taking it out to the curb for trash pick-up.

Some people just stop trying to do it right.

I don't want to get ahead of the story.
At the gym, I had scratched myself while on the stretching mat. There was blood. Of course, I stopped stretching on the mat. Do you have any idea of how disgusting people are after they work out? And they use the stretch area but NEVER clean the (still) wet spot with the disinfectant...... The same people are picky about wiping machines but never the stretching area mat.

YUCK

I hobble over to the attendant and ask for an alcohol wipe. Yes, I felt that hobbling was very appropriate.
She tells me that she is required to complete an incident report.
I know, right?
While waiting for her to find the forms. I realized that I am still bleeding.
I request a bandage.
This is what she gives to me.


I want you to look very carefully at the bandage.

Because of the budget cuts, the powers that be stopped purchasing bandages in multiple sizes. Opting instead to just buy the large bandages and cut them to different sizes.

People have stopped trying to do it right.

Later that day, I headed to the gas station. When I pump gas while wearing a skirt (see above picture) I tend to flirt with men. I don't know why. Maybe secretly I want full-serve...........

I spoke to the nice older gentleman at pump 3. I turned around to continue pumping on 2. I walk around to put the pump away and a woman says "hi" to me. It was weird. The two were at the same car. I wondered if he pumped while she paid .....
Then she hands to me a MaryKay business card attached to a magnet.
I was thinking.... For real?
Really?
Is a MaryKay representative trying to pimp me up at the gas station?
And a magnet too. What am I going to do with a magnet in my car? Stick it to my car????

All of that in one day.
Must be the sign of the times when people just stop trying........


This is my latest knitting project
I am finally using up the last of my eyelash yarn from 2004 :)

My Block is Full of Mystery

The Mysterious Third Can
Yesterday was trash pick up day. After work, I pulled up to my home and found three trash cans.

Two, I recognized. This one is the the mystery. Look at it. It looks like it belongs at my house. It was the only one standing upright in my yard. To the casual observer, it is my trash can. But it is not. The other two had fallen down. Very odd.

Did they mate? And why won't the real owner of this can retrieve it?

I don't know why, but strange things continue to happen.
Geppetto? or Pied Piper? To whom do these kids belong?
The number of children on my block have grown. I remember 4 maybe 6 kids. Now there appear to be twelve. Seriously.
I asked the SAHM across the street to explain it all to me. She assured me that there were only two new kids, as one house had new owners. It didn't add up.
Then I got it.

The kids across the street had been on "This side of the street" restriction until about two weeks ago. Now that they can cross the street, they are all over my yard and my neighbor's yard.

And they act as if they own the entire block. I see them riding their bikes (six to 8 kids at a time) up and down another neighbor's driveway. He recently had it blacktopped so it is smoooooth riding for them. It is like a carousel. They kids ride from the blue house on the corner to the middle of the block, into the driveway and make a u-turn back to the blue house. One after the other. They do this when he is at work.

They are so laid back that one day, I spied a pair of socks and shoes on my front lawn. For several hours. Then they disappeared. Magic.

Often, I come home from work and find the remains of a water balloon fight. In my lawn. On my sidewalk. Everywhere. And the kids have been sharing my name among each other. So now it is, "Hi Frizzy..... Hi Frizzy, Hi Frizzy " about 12 or so times as each child notices me. It is difficult to ignore.

Very funny.
Some stuff, I just don't want happening next door to me.
I was confused when I noticed that the little girls (who previously did not cross the street) seem to visit the next door neighbor, Junior, on his front lawn and try to stand near him. Then I remembered that his voice is deepening. It is amazing. This kid is now a middle school hunk. One gal can't keep her hands off of him. I think she has a crush but he doesn't know what to do. Last week, the kids were serenading thee couple with that classic romantic ditty
"K-I-S-S-I-N-G........."
I write this because I have been sitting on my porch lately. On evenings that I know the mom is not home, I like to stand on my stoop and watch the kids to make sure that he doesn't leave and they don't go in the house. Yeah, I have my eyes on him.
Other stuff, I don't need to know
On Sunday, I saw Junior dragging the house water hose and cart across the street. I think that I saw six other kids following him wearing their swim suits. They were headed to another kid's house. I thought about shouting after him. I know that noone would have approved of him taking the hose cart. But......I changed my mind and went back to my romance novel. There were too many explanations for the hose...I wasn't that curious.

Sounds of the night
In addition to the sound of kids playing there has been a lot of extra noises lately.
The next door neighbors decided to get a puppy just to annoy me. The puppy and the older dog like to play "keep away" with their steel bowls at about one am every night on the cement driveway.
One night, I snuck out there, flipped over the steel bowl, stole one of the driveway paving stones, put it in the bowl, filled it with water, and went back to bed. Mystery of the early morning racket, resolved.

Polite Outrage

So, I had an interesting visit from my neighbor last night. I was on the phone with my satellite dish company. If you have read my blogs you know that I have a hate-hate relationship with my communication services. I endure their outages, and they gouge me with late payments for being short three dollars. I try to call them when I am relaxed but it never fails, I lose my temper. My neighbor, Anarchy calls it “Polite Outrage.” According to her, I do not really raise my voice and I say things like “ridiculous” and “unacceptable” when other people scream and curse. I guess i am known for having a low voice. So when I think I am raising it, I am not really raising it at all. She knows all of this because she overheard me yesterday.

She had come to the house while I was in the midst of being curtly informed that I ‘would have to wait until Tuesday for a service appointment for the malfunctioning replacement DVR for which he will gladly waive the fee, even though he would be delighted to schedule an appointment sooner, but other customers have already set-up service calls meaning that I would be without dish service for five days that will be credited to my account and I should be sure to return the original defective DVR as soon as possible despite that I will not be able to watch any programming until my service call because I do not want to have any more problems.’ Arghhh. I was not able to finish my girlfriend's shawl because I was so angry about the malfunctioning DVR. I needed it ready for my Friday night shows.

Yeah, all of that. Once I ended my call on a high note. If you can call waiting five days for a service appointment and trying to live like it is 2003 and I do not have a DVR, a high note.

I asked Anarchy “ What’s up”

She told me that there were no lights on at her home, all the cars were gone, the children (her cousins) were missing, and she heard noises. She appeared quite frightened. She had entered the dark house and was unable to turn on the lights because the switches had been moved. The TV looked as if someone had tried to move it by placing a blanket under it and she heard sounds from the second floor. No one was home.

I could not tell if she were more frightened about the missing children or the darkened house. It was her job to watch the children and make their dinner. She and I began calling members of her family. No one answered but messages were left for the parents. She asked me when was the last time I “saw anyone at the house?” I saw the kids playing around the house when I arrived home from the gym at 7 p.m. It was not almost 10 p.m.

As we spoke in whispers while nervously glancing at the house, the children emerged, slowly one by one. The eldest asked, “Why did you leave?”

Anarchy asked, “Where the hell were you?” The kids said, “We were playing Hide And Seek.”

That was when she absolutely lost her mind…..

And I had front row seats.

I can’t tell anymore because I still have to live there.

She had left a message with the mother who, in turn, had called the kids. The kids told her that Anarchy had entered the house during their game, tried to turn on the lights, looked at the TV and then rushed out while leaving the door wide open. The mother told them to go to my house and gather their older cousin who was going nuts looking for them.

They watched Anarchy the entire time and said nothing to her. The kids had been sitting on the couch in the dark, very quietly to avoid detection from the Seeker.

She was so angry with the kids she stayed at my house until she calmed down.

I don’t blame her, if that had been me someone would have had to hold me down and forget about Polite Outrage.

Another boring Summer

Long Hot Summer

The past few weeks have been torture for me. First there is the escalating humidity and heat. Then the mosquitoes continue to keep me from weeding my garden or generally enjoying the outside. I have banana peppers that need to be picked. Carrots that need to be thinned. Collards that need attention. You should see the weeds. Of course, my lawn needs to be mowed. Anarchy complained about it yesterday. I suggested that she find someone to mow it. I could care less. I think lawn is stupid. It doesn't attract butterflies. I asked the young lady staying with me to get one of her male suitors to mow the lawn. She laughed at me. I still say a man isn't worth the price of salt if he is unwilling to mow your lawn.

I planted Cannas and cucumbers along the fence between our homes. The cannas will act as a natural fence and the cucumbers will keep both families happy. I am bribing my neighbor into shoveling my sidewalk next winter with summer vegetables. Do you think it will work?

I have been working on a plan to rid myself of these extra pounds all summer. I have lost nothing. nothing at all.

1. There is yoga on Mondays - with this new instructor I am finally enjoying yoga.
2. a minimum of two days a week at the gym weightlifting and elliptical machine - with a good vampire book and mp3 player
3. on cool days I attend dance lessons - there is no air in the building
4. I garden, and of course- when I am not be sucked dry
5. I craft - for God's sake, stop me from buying more yarn.

I joined the campus gym. After work, I shed my career clothes for lycra and cotton. I usually run into students that I know. It used to bother me that they could make out my body type in my athletic clothes. As if they had additional personal information. I call the college students at the campus gym, the "Beautiful People." The slim 20 somethings and their lackadaisical attitude towards sweating. Or the slender athletes that are grooming their perfect muscles. I can deal with all of that because I am not the only frumpy looking person there. I do not mind using the machine between to former cross-country runners with abs of steel and legs of iron if behind me there is another out of shape 30 something professional employee. I like seeing the 40 year old alum playing pick-up basketball with the fraternity boys. I enjoy taking yoga with retirees. What I do not like is the smells. I am convinced that some of students work-out even if they haven't showered in a few days. I have been sent off the machines more than once because of just plain STINK. Neither music playing from my ear buds nor a good book can distract me from smells that emit from the unbathed.

This summer I have been pretty busy with craft projects. My birthday passed. It was fun. I asked for $7 to buy yarn from those who insisted on bringing gifts. Hey, my needs are simple. After six years, my favorite local yarn store is closing. I had been shopping there since 2005. I thought that it had beat my bad luck. I was afraid to patron the store because in my history all of my favorite yarn stores close soon after I shop there. It happened to me in Detroit, in Stow, in Akron and finally in Toledo. What is the Frizzy Hooker supposed to do about a local yarn store?

Not to Belabor the Topic of " Doo doo on my Balcony"

I finally heard back from my other neighbor. She, too, has found inexplicable piles of dog poo in her back yard and on the driveway. Neither of us own a dog or can explain why the poo appears to have been dropped on the driveway or in my case thrown onto the balcony. She does not have a balcony which probably saved her from the irritation. The mystery continues.

Kharma Let Me Be

I can't explain it. Tuesday, I found dried animal poo on my driveway as I headed toward the garage. I was angry but I ignored it. I could not imagine how it got there. Even if a dog had pooed in my driveway it would not have walked a few yards and pooed a second time. And the poo would not have dried out overnight. It was not that hot.
Wednesday it rained and the dried animal poo was not. It had flies buzzing around it and I shouted "Who is throwing poop in my driveway?" No one answered.
Thursday I went to check my balcony for the source of the leak and found a mound of poo that looked as if it had been shaped into a ball. It was on the edge of the balcony as if it had been thrown there. I asked the neighbor kids if they were throwing poo at my balcony.

They suggested that it was squirrel poo. Considering the size of the average squirrel, if it had been squirrel poo that would mean it extruded about 1/3 its body mass.
They suggested rabbit poo. It was 500% the size of on rabbit turd. Finally Junior says that his sister is really a monkey and she is always throwing her poo around. He apologized for her.
So much for asking the children.
I called my neighbor and sent an email to the other one to ask if they had noticed anything odd.
The going theory is that I have bad karma

Indestructible

Stray Cats are Indestructible

My South neighbor (the one that feeds and houses stray cats in her garage) finally hired an exterminator to get rid of them

To recap, what began as a one cat found living in her tree with three tiny kittens has evolved into a stray cat nightmare.  She tried to catch them and take them to the animal shelter.  She would catch the nursing female but none of the kittens which were too small to trigger the trap.  She would let the female out in order to maintain the cat family unit. 

Of course, that female slut has had two more broods since first taking up house in that tree. Why should she or ANY of her kittens leave?  She had housing, fresh water and food.  I think there were at least 5 cats living in her garage and pooping in my yard.  They are very considerate not to poop in her yard but have no reservations regarding befouling my garden.   I was afraid to use my herbs last year.  I was afraid to dry them out.  I just let them die.

 
This year, I am terrified for my lettuce.  I had been stealing my roomies used coffee grounds for a week before I told them what I was doing.  I am creating a cat repellent.  I spread the grounds around the lettuce.

After months of dropping hints to my neighbor she is finally hiring a professional to catch the cats and remove them from her garage.

Wednesday the exterminator placed the critter trap near her garage.  Good idea.  That is where they live after all.  ‘Cept, all he caught was a possum.

I saw it on my way to my garage and laughed my tail off.  No pun intended. 

One of the stray cats was lying in her bird bath (which is in stalking distance of my bird feeder) watching the possum struggle. 

 

Another neighbor on the North side of my house asked the exterminator about family cats that are permitted outside.  He informed her that all cats in Toledo require a collar and a license.   She, like me, hates the stray cats.  They are a huge nuisance to everyone. New neighbors always remark about the large number of strays in the neighborhood.  I should mention the stray cats did not begin with the Southside neighbor but a neighbor across the street.  The house had been empty for a month and the new owners unceremoniously removed three kittens from the garage.  One of those kittens found herself in my neighbor’s tree. 

She called four pet stores only to be laughed at four times. No one really sells cat collars and the region does not require a license. She did find a collar and her extremely well-fed cat wears it proudly.  I can not imagine how anyone could confuse a pampered stray and a pampered pet.  I would describe her cat as dwarf panther.    

If you are an animal lover and are finding yourself becoming very uncomfortable reading this blog visit this link and spay or neuter your own pets before they become someone else’s problem.

   

Thursday the exterminator had placed the trap under the garage door and used old closet doors to block off the space forcing the cats to enter the trap.  When I got home from work, I noticed the trap empty but the garage was missing a window.  The Northside neighbor and I laughed ourselves silly over a glass of rum and coke on her porch while her house cat lazily watched us. 

I would have taken a picture this morning but I think she decided to cut her losses.  Two animal traps looked as if they had been thrown into a corner where she keeps her cutting. 

I hope she gets is right before I do something drastic.

Indestructible

Stray Cats are Indestructible

My South neighbor (the one that feeds and houses stray cats in her garage) finally hired an exterminator to get rid of them

To recap, what began as a one cat found living in her tree with three tiny kittens has evolved into a stray cat nightmare. She tried to catch them and take them to the animal shelter. She would catch the nursing female but none of the kittens which were too small to trigger the trap. She would let the female out in order to maintain the cat family unit.

Of course, that female slut has had two more broods since first taking up house in that tree. Why should she or ANY of her kittens leave? She had housing, fresh water and food. I think there were at least 5 cats living in her garage and pooping in my yard. They are very considerate not to poop in her yard but have no reservations regarding befouling my garden. I was afraid to use my herbs last year. I was afraid to dry them out. I just let them die.

This year, I am terrified for my lettuce. I had been stealing my roomies used coffee grounds for a week before I told them what I was doing. I am creating a cat repellent. I spread the grounds around the lettuce.

After months of dropping hints to my neighbor she is finally hiring a professional to catch the cats and remove them from her garage.

Wednesday the exterminator placed the critter trap near her garage. Good idea. That is where they live after all. ‘Cept, all he caught was a possum.

I saw it on my way to my garage and laughed my tail off. No pun intended.

One of the stray cats was lying in her bird bath (which is in stalking distance of my bird feeder) watching the possum struggle.

Another neighbor on the North side of my house asked the exterminator about family cats that are permitted outside. He informed her that all cats in Toledo require a collar and a license. She, like me, hates the stray cats. They are a huge nuisance to everyone. New neighbors always remark about the large number of strays in the neighborhood. I should mention the stray cats did not begin with the Southside neighbor but a neighbor across the street. The house had been empty for a month and the new owners unceremoniously removed three kittens from the garage. One of those kittens found herself in my neighbor’s tree.

She called four pet stores only to be laughed at four times. No one really sells cat collars and the region does not require a license. She did find a collar and her extremely well-fed cat wears it proudly. I can not imagine how anyone could confuse a pampered stray and a pampered pet. I would describe her cat as dwarf panther.

If you are an animal lover and are finding yourself becoming very uncomfortable reading this blog visit this link and spay or neuter your own pets before they become someone else’s problem.

Thursday the exterminator had placed the trap under the garage door and used old closet doors to block off the space forcing the cats to enter the trap. When I got home from work, I noticed the trap empty but the garage was missing a window. The Northside neighbor and I laughed ourselves silly over a glass of rum and coke on her porch while her house cat lazily watched us.

I would have taken a picture this morning but I think she decided to cut her losses. Two animal traps looked as if they had been thrown into a corner where she keeps her cutting.

I hope she gets is right before I do something drastic.

I also wanted to say "hi" to my Crabby Swap Partner

Homeowner Chronicles

Homeowner Chronicles

What a morning I have had.

After I reviewed my lawn a few weeks back, I realized that it needed some clean-up and new mulch. A few years ago, it took about 15 bags of mulch to get it together.

I went around to different home stores, hardware stores and landscaping places to price out mulch.

Shopping at those types of stores used to be intimidating until I learned a few tricks. Sometimes I go after work with my heels and skirts. It is fun. Some contractor always wants to be helpful. Offers his services to me. Once while looking at toilet seats a guy told me that he could install a new toilet for me. Whatever….. I told him that I would rather he "Mow my lawn"

But going to those DIY stores in heels takes some energy. Especially after work. I have to pretend that my feet do not hurt and that I am on a mission. The determined career girl.

On the weekends, I used to just get up and go to the DIY store. I didn’t enjoy that either. I had to know exactly what I wanted because it was difficult to find anyone to help me. I was one of many. On the other hand, I could take my time because my feet did not hurt.

Today, I like to go lawncare shopping wearing fun clothes and cleaned up (i.e. hair curled and maybe some makeup) and well rested. No more rolling out of the bed or going after work. Last week, I figured my new attitude was the reason why so many people kept smiling at me. Then I remembered that I was wearing my Thundercats t-shirt. I enjoyed myself so much that I think I will always wear a funny shirt.

I like going to the local hardware store where the sales people help me right away and I can get my tools sharpened. That was a new task for me. I have never gotten knives or tools sharpened before. I felt like a tourist going into the hardware store and asking him to sharpen my tools. Now I have to figure out how to get my lawnmower blades off to get them sharpened. Luckily for me I have neighbors that will help me with stuff like that.

Comparison shopping for mulch isn’t easy. I could have purchased the bags and loaded up my car then unloaded it at home. But the cost seemed too high. I looked into having it delivered. The costs ranged from $45 to $140 for one cubic yard. That seemed too high. A cubic yard is about 14 2-cubic feet bags of mulch. If I had bought that out right it would have cost me about $42 bucks. I figured that 2 cubic yards of bulk mulch was a better choice because I could split the cost with my neighbor Linda who needed to landscape her yard after cutting down her pine tree. Delivery was the problem. I priced delivery costs and had settled on $65 split between the two of us. When I went to the landscape office it was closed on the day that I had set aside to order the mulch. My neighbor was out of town for a week and I had to come up with a alternate plan.

Another friend got 2 yards of mulch (about 27 2-cubic feet bags) for $36 bucks from the City forestry department. I thought that was the ticket. I would do it his way. He agreed to help. I would arrive at about 7:30 am and he would dump the mulch in the driveway and I would transport it to the back of my house. He assured me that it would take just a few minutes to unload the mulch.

Do you have any idea what two cubic yards of mulch looks like? I didn’t. I figured that he would pull his trailer up and I could easily use the wheelbarrow to deliver ½ the mulch to my neighbor and ½ to me. Of course my friend lives on a larger lot and he was able to pull the trailer onto his lawn and dump the mulch out into his backyard. My lot is tiny and my driveway is narrow. We should have considered this but neither of us are engineers – indeed, we are educators..

I had no idea that it would take almost an hour to unload the freaking trailer of mulch. Or that doing so would be so tiring. We pulled the trailer into the driveway thinking that would shorten the wheelbarrow trip. It did but that still wasn’t what I had expected. He wanted to be helpful and I thought I would take advantage of his offer. I had asked a few neighbors to assist but they to leave because my friend didn’t arrive until after 8 am. When he arrived he admitted that he was able to get me more than 2 yards. It was more like three. I am thinking THANKS.

Linda’s father passed away this weekend and she was not able to help unload the mulch so I put it all in my yard and she will have to wheelbarrow her half out ALL BY HERSELF.

After we unloaded ¾ of the mulch I said “enough” and asked my friend to take the extra mulch back to his house. He was so agreeable and felt bad about the whole thing that he agreed to come back after it was cleaned out and load up the bed that had been sitting in my garage to take to my Great Aunt. I have been trying to deliver this bed to my Great Aunt for two months. She is in her 70’s and is sleeping on her old mother’s bed that is at least 50 years old. That was nice. I will pay him later this week. Since I am also his supervisor I told him he could take the day off.

All I have to do now is make amends with my roommate. Had I known we were going to be in the driveway so long I would have made afternoon arrangements for the mulch delivery. I probably woke the poor dear up a second time. I work out most mornings but this morning the tv was louder than usual. I was watching Underworld Evolution last night and had turned on the surround sound. Even turned down it was BOOMING. My poor2nd shift employee had to drag herself out of bed to ask me to turn it down. That was at 7 am. Maybe I will get her a Thundercats logo t-shirt to make her smile.

Good Neighbors

I am going to try a new type of blogging. Random nature blogging...... Here goes....

I bought my house three years ago. Very funny business, owning a home. So many things that go wrong. I have battled with my lawn just trying to get it to grow. I have dealt with crab grass in 2005 and grub worms in 2006. This year is THE YEAR. This year is my year. I will have a luxurious lawn. Mark my words. Even though I think that the green lawn is the most absurd pursuit of modern culture. And I have horrible allergies. And I promise never to mow my own lawn.... Yet, It will grow for me this year.

With that goal in mind my life has finally slowed down enough to get into the yard. My first task was to find someone to cut the grass. You should see my lawn. It is mostly filled in. Where it is not you will find bare patches. I stared and followed the bare patches and realized they are shaped like tracks. Tracks of the lawn mower or maybe the grass spreader. So, I probably should not use the spreader to reseed the lawn.

Saturday I began my lawn care duties. First, I cleaned out the garage which was bittersweet. About 45 cannas froze in my garage this winter killing all of them. I was hurt. I love those cannas and had planned to give some away to friends. I carefully dug them up last summer, placed them in peat moss, dusted them with powder to prevent fungus and stored them in the garage. I used the cannas to make a living privacy fence for my northside neighbor. I wanted to use the cannas to create a living fence for two more sides of neighbors this year. On the south side is the big rotweiller that barks whenever someone passes and the kids that keep losing their basketball in my yard but will not hop the fence and get it.

Isn’t that the silliest thing? They just leave the ball in my yard as if it no longer exists to them. Or it has disappeared. When I see them I say “hey did you lose a ball?” Junior says something like, “Let me check. ….” He goes to some imaginary place in his garage to check for his basketball and returns to admit that it is his ball. Sometimes the ball is just sitting in the middle of my yard. Like they didn’t see it fly into my yard when they missed the basket hoop. ONCE the ball was there for days. I didn't let the grass get that long.

The neighbors to the west are a mixed bag. My back property borders two neighbors. On my side the previous owners had permitted mulberry trees to grow unchecked. The neighbors would trim the trees and throw the cuttings into my yard. Finally, I had someone cut the trees down but as you know the people that I hire tend to do a half ass job. So the trees keep making new branches. This winter I drilled holes into the bases of the trees and filled the hole with salt. Doesn’t that sound crazy? I found the idea on the Net as a way to kill mulberry trees. It did not work. I have living mulberry trees despite my poisoning attempts and dead Cannas despite my careful storage.

After cleaning the garage, I inspected the yard for flowers that needed replacement. My mums looks shabby. There are ants all over my peonies. I don’t know where these ants have come from. So of course I looked it up on Yahoo! Search and ants are peonies are a good thing. Who knew that I like Haiku....

Thirsty ants cover The succulent peony Hungry for nectar ~Lucy Aegerter

Well anyway i need to find a dependable person to cut the lawn. As you know that has been an impossible task for me. Last year, I thought I had an arrangement but the piled up newspapers made the young entrepenuer think that i had moved away. http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-aFmqok8jdKQKRIZLkIAQtkHo?p=347

Thank goodness northside Neighbor cut down her very ugly tree. Now there is more light in both our yards so we decided to buy 2 cubic yards of mulch together. If I can only get South Neighbor to cut his hideous tree that dangerously looms over my house threatening to slap it silly during all windstorms.

There’s the patches of dirt in the yard, the crabgrass, weeds and dog poo. Yuck. I see the little neighborhood girl walking her dog as she lets him do his business in my northern neighbors yard, I shout to her “do you have a pooper scooper for that dog?”

For more funny pictures, visit FunLOL.com!
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At that point I decided to finish up in the house and make a to do list for the next day.