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Spend this night boning her

Thursday, October 13, 2011

I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends


Since my roommate moved out, I have had only Fuzzy to keep me company at night. So I guess that I have been paying more attention to her behavior.
For instance, I caught her doing an impression of ceiling cat in the basement.
Funny pictures rated PG-13
see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!

She exited from a small opening that led to the area above the basement drop ceiling and under the main floor. I wondered what she could be up to in there and then quickly put it out of my head.
Until, I spotted a stain on ceiling tiles.
I removed the tile and found some very strange stuff. Leaves. Like from the Fall.
I made a call to Uncle Handyman and told him that I wanted him to come over.Remember the groundhog burrow under my garden? I figured that somehow the leaves had blown in at the start of the season. Sometime after April when AT and T pulled down ALL the ceiling tiles to replace my telephone wires. Besides, the garden was done for the season seeing how all the veggies were eaten the week before.
I couldn't schedule him to come to the house right away because I work late Tuesday thru Thursday and that weekend I had events to attend. The groundhog burrow and leaves in my basement could wait a little while longer.
Fuzzy started acting strange again. I noticed around Sunday night that she had stopped eating.
Tuesday morning as I am leaving for the gym I smelled something awful in the living room. I see Fuzzy pawing at floor near the couch and remember that I forgot to clean her liter box.
Feeling remorse, I drop my bags and look under the couch to see where she poo'd.
I spotted one of my elephant toys under the couch and cried, "Not Ellie." Fuzzy surely had poo'd all over Ellie in retribution for my not cleaning her litter box.
I pushed the toy back behind the couch with a broom and climbed the couch to reach out with my gloved hand to grab the filthy toy.

It Blinked.

I screamed.

Fuzzy ran.

Well, Fuzzy sure was helpful.
I called a friend and described the animal through gasping breaths.
It was a possum.
I called Leeza, next door, and told her about it. She came over with a net. Yes, the same net she brought over last year when I had the bat in my bathroom.

The neighbors were a godsend.
Leeza insisted on taking a picture of it.

After some silly running around to rearrange furniture, we realized that we were out of our league. I walked out onto my porch, observed the houses with lights at 7 am and picked the neighbor who I liked more.
She sent her husband over and the three of us created a pathway out of the house for the possum that was in no mood to leave. Finally, Leeza got her German Shephard to coax the creature out of the house.
And he sure did. Coaxed the poo right out of the possum all over my living room.
We finally got the dog away from the possum and the possum into the net.
Here it is playing possum. In the second picture it is pooping again.

During all of this my horrible sister made numerous "helpful" calls,
1. "No one from the city will remove a possum. They are vicious."
2. "Be sure to use gloves, possums carry diseases"
3. "You should check your basement. Possum's have ten babies"
4. "Kitty litter on the possum poop is a good idea. That stuff is a hell to clean up"
5. "My co-worker said that you should buy two animal traps: one for the outside and one for the inside"
6. "If you don't catch them all, they will just keep coming back"

After thanking my neighbors, walking past the poo filled living room to sit in my upstairs bedroom, I decided to draft some poetry while I calmed myself:

The groundhog eats from
the garden treats and invites
possum for nightcaps

Small possum all alone
Wonder where large possums go
After sunrises 

Goldilocks critter
cat food not too hot or cold
kitty traps the thief 

Stuffed toy under chair
Does not blink but possums do
Kitty runs and hides 

Barkless dog sniffs prey
Jaws clamps down and poops exhudes
From possums stink hole 

I posted the verses on Facebook and my online friends helped me to get back to my life and head to work. So, it would seem that I had a lot of help from my friends in getting my house back to normal. Too bad I had ignored all of Fuzzy's signs that something was wrong in my house.


Anonymous said...

Poor Fuzzy was probably looking at you and thinking, "Oh, for the love of Pete! I told you!"

Jo said...

Seriously, Beth is right! Fuzzy tried to tell you. That is a horrible and yet hilarious tale. I am sorry you have such a mess, but glad you found enough humor in it to share.
Got my evening giggle! :)

Angie said...

Oh bless you! I'm glad it wasn't me.

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing this humorous story and for writing about our furry friends - as pesty as they may be!

Mary's Sharing Space said...

Good luck catching the critters. I do know a quick way to catch them....have-a-heart trap, placed near where it comes in. Dunkin' Donuts in the trap! The staler the better. Don't ask me why, just worked better than cat food.

The Frizzy Hooker said...

Thanks all
Fuzzy is okay for an early warning system. I am going to purchase a trap and thanks for the tip about DD. I like going there for donuts.

Darlene ~Bloggity Blogger~ said...

I shouldn't be laughing...sorry...

I had 2 baby raccoons living in my garage a few years ago. They were happy as pigs in a puddle. I guess they were orphaned because there was no momma around. I let them eat the cat food and live there until they grew larger, then I took my broom and chased them to the woods where they belong! I feel for you having raccoon poo in your living room. Raccoon poo is some nasty stuff!

I hope you find where the possum got into you house and block the opening.

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